Such Is Life
Such Is Life Death Doula Services LLC
SIL offers nonmedical support to individuals, families and their caregivers in order to help guide, educate and comfort as they navigate serious illnesses and end of life transitions.
“Everyone should be so loved!”
Why You Need an End of Life Doula
Advance Planning
What is it and why do I need it?
Close your eyes and think about what’s around you - what’s yours, what you love, what’s important to you, not necessarily just things, ideas, how you would like your last days to look if you were faced with such a decision in the future. Now open your eyes and tell me, does anyone else know the details of what is important to you? People agree that end of life planning is extremely valuable, but few will have the desire, energy, time or support to do it. Advance care planning enables your end-of-life care wishes to be honored if you’re unable to communicate them yourself. The value is in the ability to make these wishes tangible, written down, put in a place where someone can find them. Planning well requires information, support, assistance and access to local resources.
Such is Life can help guide you, taking your direction and documenting your wishes. Thinking about this isn’t easy, but it’s the first step in gaining the peace of mind that comes with knowing your wishes will be honored by the people you choose.
Compassionate Support
End of Life Doulas are equipped to navigate the complexities of dying and are prepared to support individuals who often avoid or lack the emotional capacity to address end-of-life matters on their own. Awareness and acceptance of the death processes through intimate conversations about life, unfinished business and comfort wishes can relieve anxiety, diminish pain and increase quality time. Searching for meaning through a process of life review or creating a legacy of a life well lived can be inspiring and comforting as we face these issues together.
Such is Life can help prepare a sacred space with memorable objects, music and other special items or services which will enable the transition to unfold according to your wishes.
Grief and Going Forward
Learning to live without a loved one after a death is complicated and Such is Life begins this transition with you. Honoring the process as a culturally sensitive and nonjudgmental witness to your journey will enable healing to begin for all. Your grief is yours, it is not about “moving on” or “getting over it” and there is no time frame. Let yourself feel whatever you feel at any time without worry. Be angry, yell to the heavens, cry, do not worry if you don’t. Laugh, find moments of happiness, and when you are ready, move forward knowing this experience will be with you, accepting that you are not the same person and that is so very alright. When you are stuck, know that there are people out there to help you. Such is Life is there for you.
“Several years ago, I watched my father die a very highly medicalized death in a hospital ICU, hooked up to every kind of machine known to modern medicine. It was a cold clinical death. I knew that wasn’t what my aged and ill mother wanted. I wanted her to be able to die in my home surrounded by my siblings and with the support of my husband. I had no idea how to make that happen.
Kathy helped me in more ways than I can enumerate. She helped me find the right doctor. She helped me find the right hospice. She figured out what supplies I would need at home and how to make it safe and welcoming for my mom. She put us in touch with therapy dogs. She provided my family with emotional support, in particular, being an ear for my sister who was struggling with my mother’s choices and her impending death. She sat at the bedside with us. She listened to my mother’s stories, which gave my mother such joy. She comforted us in our grief.
Death is so final and the loss so difficult. I will miss my mother every day for the rest of my life, but I shall always feel good about how she left this world. Kathy made that happen for her. I am forever grateful. ”
End of Life Doula Kathy Topazio
Katherine T. Topazio BSN RN
Daughter, Sister, Wife, Mother, Auntie, Nurse, Teacher, Manager and End-of-life Doula - Founder of Such Is Life Death Doula Services (Entrepreneur?). Phew!
I graduated from Villanova University with degrees in Psychology, Nursing, certifications as Nurse Educator, Palliative/Hospice Trainer and End-of-Life Doula. I have been a Nurse for over 37 years in areas such as Med/Surg, SICU, as a Clinical Nursing Instructor, Home Care Telehealth provider and ultimately Manager for Dementia Supportive Housing, Transitional Care, Palliative and Hospice Care Unit all in one!
What in the world made me believe that I could become an End-of-Life Doula? A eureka moment involving career long experiences holding space for others during life’s transitions. I realize that there is no place so lonely as the one we occupy when we are faced with loss of any kind.
Learning to be present for others without judgement or preconceived notions honors the respect and care that comes with a life lived. Holding space with those moving on and their families provides for grieving well and proper closure. These are my values and I believe that Such is Life!
Contact Doula Topazio
Start a conversation to learn more about how an End of Life Doula can benefit you and your loved ones.
Email: Suchislifedds@gmail.com